pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
You smell like stripper and shame
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
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