I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
