she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Ketchup is God's man juice
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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