Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
