i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Randomize
