never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
