Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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