life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
