Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
