he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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