batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
