How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
