I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
