Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
