DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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