I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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