gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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