I want to stick my p in your. b.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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