it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Sex in the backyard? Check.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
