Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I am one with the molecules
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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