White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
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