your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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