Your tits are I can't wait for
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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