the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize