she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I just googled if crying burns calories
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize