If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
