Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
