New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
