It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
