Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
