i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
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