Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize