dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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