So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
