This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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