i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize