just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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