just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize