East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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