its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
