How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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