hotel room ftw
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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