YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
