My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
he's gonorrhea incarnate
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
