Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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