Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
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