I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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