Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize