Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
now i know why i became what i already was.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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