Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
