Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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