READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
